Lately, I have seen a number of very strong women enter counseling with difficulties in their marriage.  Now please hear me when I say, marriage is about two people, not one.  However, when a man is not allowed to lead and is neglected respect, he very often will not be what he desires as a man, nor will he be the man his wife wants him to be within the marriage.  God designed men to need respect, and without it they very often feel incomplete and a failure.  Not to mention they can't be the man their spouse wants and needs.

Don't get me wrong, one of the greatest gifts a man can have from God is a strong wife.  But if this strength comes at the cost of a husbands respect, it will not allow the marriage to be what God intended it to be.  Eph. 5:33 says, "...and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband".  Notice, Paul says nothing in this scripture about whether the husband deserves it or not.  The act of respect is not one of slavery, it is one of admiration and acknowledgement based on obedience to God. 

Let me give you an example.  One of the most powerful things Heather does for me is to say thank you for my hard work and commitment to her and our family.  Just this verbal recognition is a form of respect and acknowledgement, and it makes me want to do so much more.

Women have a incredible opportunity to positively affect their husbands through the act of respect, and please know, this act will also return major dividends when he starts loving you more unconditionally, but this is for a later blog. 

2 comments (Add your own)

1. Meuthiea wrote:
Christian marriage coiuselnng, I believe, has greater potential as an active ingredient in the healing process than any other type of therapy. Why? Because marriage between a man and woman is God's plan so it only stands to reason that the repair procedures for an unhealthy marriage could be found in His word.My wife and I went through Christian marriage coiuselnng provided a trained, licensed, minister of the faith who was exceptionally gifted in using the Word of God to help couples in the reconciliation process. These are important credentials in choosing a counselor. What makes Christian marriage coiuselnng effective is the willingness of the couple to truly uncover, forgive, and die-to-self. It has to be understood that none of these things are within our human ability to accomplish alone. We need the help of the Holy Spirit to facilitate the type of radical change that must take place in one’s heart, deep down inside, in order for real change to take place. You’ll know it is happening when your focus is less on what your mate is doing than what you are doing in and with your relationship with God.Fifteen years later, my wife and I are stronger than ever. Has the road been free of bumps? No. But I have heard it said that if the mountain were as smooth as glass, you wouldn’t be able to climb it. We are still living in and by what we learned in Christian marriage coiuselnng. Our marriage is not about determination and resolve to make it work; its about the freedom to love one another and let the other be who they are with full faith and confidence that what holds us together is not our resolve, but trust and assurance in Jesus Christ that He is able to sustain us through any storm that might come our way.

Wed, November 28, 2012 @ 7:49 AM

2. ihcahte wrote:
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Sat, December 1, 2012 @ 10:24 PM

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